wrist deep in some week old dishes
you get terrified of living
there's an advil on the counter
by a book you almost read
and you see another city
in a movie, you consider
how the people there are better
in the life inside your head
somethings changed
you block more
calls then you take
you hate your job
get a raise
now your rent is always paid
on time you wish
you could spend
your life doing
anything you wanted
if you just knew what you wanted
another friend is turning 30
another friend is getting married
another friend moves from the city
you try cutting your own hair
in the bathroom, in the mirror
it's the irony of hating
being young and sick of waiting
still you always end up right here
nothing’s changed
you block more
calls then you take
you quit a job
out of spite
now your rent is coming late
this time you wish
you could spend
your life doing
anything you wanted
if you just knew what you wanted
when i was thirteen
i could swear to god by twenty
if not twenty then by twenty five
but what the fuck did i know in ‘09?
so i've been down and i keep
kicking myself all for nothing
if i don't amount to something
then i'm gonna go out screaming
i wanna love my life
nothings changed
you block more
calls then you take
you get a job
that you like
now your rent is always paid
on time you wish
you could spend
your life doing
anything you wanted
if you just knew what you wanted
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i love you communism i love you weird trans people i love you horrors beyond my comprehension i love you vast and terrifying expanse of the universe i love you sports game that i still don’t understand and i love you sick guitar riffs aceofcorvids